I took an hour to myself today.
A. Whole. Hour. To. Myself.
*faints*
I have not been without one (usually both) of the kids at all times for the past two months. So this afternoon, when Anne went down for nap and I had just finished nursing Joey, Brian bundled me out of the door for an uninterrupted hour of bliss.
I went for a walk around the neighbourhood. It’s grey and cloudy but unseasonably warm. The trees have lost all of their leaves already and every sidewalk is carpeted in them.
(Side story: I realised about a block in that I was talking to myself out loud. I’m so used to narrating our day with Annie and Joe that I unconsciously talk out loud all the time now.
“Well, they’ve already got their Christmas lights up! How about that? And that house has a puppy in the window!”
Wait a minute. I’m by myself. And getting odd looks from passersby…..better shut up, Sarah.)
Then I walked over to our neighbourhood coffee shop. I got my usual and curled up to read my book for the remainder of the time. I had a table of girls from the soccer tournament right next to me. I really like teenage girls. They are the best seatmates if you want some good eavesdropping. “Totally, man.”
I walked back home and found both tinies still fast asleep and Brian pounding on the computer, trying to finish this paper of his that has become the bane of my existence.
I realised afresh just how much I need alone time. I am, by nature, an introvert. I need a lot of alone time. I am naturally pretty quiet and to-myself. I have learned to be more outgoing and friendly. And I enjoy it. I love chatting with people, I love making friends now, I love keeping friends. But it does tire me out. I am weary and when I am weary the best thing for me is an hour like this. An hour to think and wander, to read and enjoy a cup of tea.
And to just be quiet.
