So today is Mardi Gras which means tomorrow is Ash Wednesday. (Boy, Easter is falling very early this year! I was surprised when I realised this weekend that Lent is almost upon us.)
Some of you might remember that over the past 3-4 years, Lent has become a rather significant season for me. In preparation for the celebration of Easter, the Christian church has traditionally entered a season of repentance. Some Christian denominations or churches don’t practice this ancient ritual for a myriad of reasons. I never grew up practicing Lent myself. But it’s become important to me. I usually attend an Ash Wednesday service and then fast something for the forty days. Traditionally, one should fast meat and a meal or some sort of food. But it’s become a bit more open because it’s being adopted by us non-Catholics. So people will fast anything from the Internet to books to sex to alcohol to television shows and so on. I think that the idea is to fast something that you will miss in your life so that whenever you would normally be prompted to say, check your email or eat lunch, you spend that time in meditation, contemplation, prayer and worship.
I’m praying today about what to fast for the season. I know that today is usually the day of excess(!) as people prepare for Lent but I think that’s kind of missing the point. 
So I’ll take today to pray and wait on God. I always find this season of 40 days as one of heightened awareness for me spiritually.
When I consciously make space for God in my life, it’s amazing how he fills it to overflowing.
One of the things I’ve incorporated into my life over the past several years has been the practice of liturgy from The Book of Common Prayer and prayers of the Daily Office. I can’t say that I’m religious about it (pahahahaha!) but I do practice it. And it’s brought such richness and depth to my worship. Man, any nondenom charismatic that disparages the Anglican liturgy must not have read it – it’s nothing but Scripture!
The big thing for Ash Wednesday is the imposition of ashes (when the priest makes the sign of the cross on your forehead with ashes). This is done to remind us of something that we don’t like to recall: we’re going to die. Pastor Andrew from Peoples Church wrote this: Now even though many of us would say that we’re not afraid of death, the truth is that when we start thinking about what death really stands for and what it entails, we’re very afraid of it. The destruction of our uniqueness, the destruction of any meaningful future, the destruction of what is beautiful about us, the destruction of our relationships, the destruction of our ability to contribute. I mean c’mon! You can’t tell me people aren’t afraid of those things! Those are the anxieties that haunt people in their sleep, and at their core, they are anxieties about death. And it is these the anxieties about death that lead people into activities that destroy them! In short, one of the basic human struggles is facing death in ways that give life.
It made me think of this verse I’ve always remembered in Psalm 90:12 “Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.” The world has corrupted that into a lame “carpe diem” mentality that makes people jump out of planes and have sex with people they shouldn’t but I think it’s become much bigger than that for me. When you live like you don’t have forever, it gives you wisdom to pursue what truly matters. When you face your mortality, you concentrate on what will be immortal.
When one is confronted with the fact of their own demise, there is usually a reckoning that takes place. So that’s how I see it – this is just one season of my life (40 days isn’t that long) and it’s my opportunity to repent and prepare the soil of my heart for the gloriousness that is Easter. It’s meant to mimic a “dark night of the soul” when we wrestle with our faults, our failings, our shortcomings and hurts; to lay them at the feet of Jesus and be reminded of our need for a Saviour.
One of the prayers that has really come to matter to me is the Confession of Sin that we do corporately:
“Most merciful God, we confess that we have sinned against you in thought, word and deed, by what we have done and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you with our whole hearts; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves. We are truly sorry and we humbly repent. For the sake of your Son Jesus Christ, have mercy on us and forgive us; that we may delight in your will and walk in your ways, to the glory of your name. Amen.”
At Ash Wednesday services, we usually read the Penitential Psalms such as Psalm 51.
Generous in love—God, give grace! Huge in mercy—wipe out my bad record.
Scrub away my guilt,
soak out my sins in your laundry.
I know how bad I’ve been;
my sins are staring me down.
You’re the One I’ve violated, and you’ve seen
it all, seen the full extent of my evil.
You have all the facts before you;
whatever you decide about me is fair.
I’ve been out of step with you for a long time,
in the wrong since before I was born.
What you’re after is truth from the inside out.
Enter me, then; conceive a new, true life.
Soak me in your laundry and I’ll come out clean,
scrub me and I’ll have a snow-white life.
Tune me in to foot-tapping songs,
set these once-broken bones to dancing.
Don’t look too close for blemishes,
give me a clean bill of health.
God, make a fresh start in me,
shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life.
Don’t throw me out with the trash,
or fail to breathe holiness in me.
Bring me back from gray exile,
put a fresh wind in my sails!
Give me a job teaching rebels your ways
so the lost can find their way home.
Commute my death sentence, God, my salvation God,
and I’ll sing anthems to your life-giving ways.
Unbutton my lips, dear God;
I’ll let loose with your praise.
Going through the motions doesn’t please you,
a flawless performance is nothing to you.
I learned God-worship
when my pride was shattered.
Heart-shattered lives ready for love
don’t for a moment escape God’s notice.
Make Zion the place you delight in,
repair Jerusalem’s broken-down walls.
Then you’ll get real worship from us,
acts of worship small and large,
Including all the bulls
they can heave onto your altar!
