My usual readers know that I suffer from a deplorable lack of opinions and rarely, if ever, express my opinions.
Be forewarned.
Isn’t it funny how women will spend more time figuring out what hairstyle to get or what TV to buy or what everyone wore to the VMAs than they will spend deciding on what type of birth experience they want to have?
Birthing and mothering has been something that has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I was privileged to be raised by a mother that was very natural in her approach to parenting; living on the edge for the 70s and early 80s by doing things like natural childbirth, breastfeeding exclusively, cloth diapering etc. (And you wonder where I get my opinions from….) Every birthday, she told us our “Birth Story”. She modeled very positive attitudes about birth, mothering, breastfeeding etc. She was also a great resource to the women of our communities, often coming alongside other mothers to help them or advise them or pray with them. As a result of this, I grew up very familiar with birthing, mothering, breastfeeding etc. I didn’t have a lot of fear about it and had a lot of knowledge, even though it was secondhand.
I gave birth to Anne naturally without “interventions” directly as a result of what I had learned and studied and been taught. And it was a tremendous experience. There are a few things I would do differently if I had to go back but it was more related to things like positioning than anything else. And it isn’t some female machismo – it was about the whole experience and journey of birthing. It mattered to me before it even happened and now that it is about to happen again, I’m getting ready for another transformation.
I don’t think that many women would deny that birthing is a transformative experience. It is more than just “having a healthy baby” – it is about the journey and the experience, the struggle and the reward.
I recently watched the documentary “The Business of Being Born.” I am of the opinion that EVERY woman who has ever given birth, will give birth or knows people that will/have been giving birth to WATCH THIS MOVIE. And yes, the capitals are necessary. 
It was tremendous. Fairly short (just an hour and twenty minutes) but packed with positive birth stories and very empowering. It’s amazing how few people have ever seen a natural birth. Usually all we have are these horror stories or A Baby Story (don’t even get me started about that awful show and its sister shows like “Bringing Home Baby“) or trauma shows - no wonder women are so terrified of birth! No wonder they just do whatever the doctor tells them to do!
This movie promotes such a healthy view of birthing. It articulated a lot of my opinions about the process particularly the spiral of interventions (induction leads to lots of drugs which leads to emergency c-sections etc.) and the way that women have been convinced that they don’t know how to give birth. Talk about an industry that thrives on fear, fear, fear!
(By the way, I don’t mean to come across as judgemental. That’s not my heart AT ALL. Everyone has different experiences. But sometimes I get so mad at “the system” and “the fear” that I can be a bit over-the-top. I’m mad FOR these women – not AT them - that have been belittled or disempowered, that have missed a great experience. That’s all that this is. No judgement. Just a sisterhood thing that they got ripped off.)
I realised about halfway through this pregnancy that I am the only one of my friends here in Vancouver that has an ob-gyn. (I work with a lot of women in the same stage of life with toddlers and another one on the way or brand new. We love to talk us some babies at work!! 
) They are all with midwives and more than half are home-birthers. I was surprised because my immediate experience was all hospital births. If anything, amongst my other friends, I’m the crazy one because of my commitment to natural childbirth, extended and exclusive breastfeeding, co-sleeping, baby-wearing etc. So I was out-granola-ed! 
LOL So three months ago, I really seriously contemplated switching to a midwife but finally just decided to stay with my doctor even though I’m very low-risk. I figured it was “too late” switch and, to be honest, just got too busy. Then this past month, it’s been really bugging me.
I wish I would have gotten a midwife after all. And I REALLY wish I was giving birth at home. I have several friends that have done this. And of course, this documentary is positive about the experience. As I look forward to the birth of this new baby, I’ve realised that there are certain things that I didn’t like about hospitals or about ob-gyn experience.
And here’s the thing: our hospitals here are VERY pro-natural childbirth. (They are a lot better than most hospitals or doctors that I’ve heard about and personally experienced in the USA for instance. I’ve often said, even before I had children, that if I was in the States still, I would definitely be birthing at home and getting the heck out of the hospital system.) My hospital encourages and provides for support for breastfeeding. They require “rooming in” and don’t even have a nursery. Our public health system comes to your house one week later to check on you and the baby and will continue to come as long as you need them. Overall, it’s as good as it gets, I think.
And I’m very thankful for ob-gyns. They’re surgeons for a reason. And thank God that when its needed, they are there and ready. But for the more than 90% of women that aren’t high risk or likely to develop complications, it’s definitely overkill. And then it results in a lot of interventions that result in a lot of stress. And an experience that transforms but for the wrong reasons.
I just would love to have a midwife and a homebirth. For instance, I like my doctor a lot. But she was hardly there for Anne’s birth. And whatever she did to help Anne be born (even posterior) could have been done by a midwife. I had a nurse instead that I really didn’t like. Even though I had a great relationship with my ob-gyn, I was stuck with this nurse the whole time. (Note: I love and respect nurses. It was just a personality clash with this woman.) How much better would it be to have built a relationship with a midwife, so that they know you and your husband well, and then they are there with you the whole time? I bet a midwife wouldn’t have had me on my back, trying to push out a posterior, 9 lb baby.
The other thing is that I just hate hospitals. I was miserable at the hospital. I would love to do a homebirth so that I could just relax in my own home (or my mother’s ). Anne could hang out with the family or head out for they days. I could just have a shower in my own washroom. I hated being woken up every 2 hours for checking, hated the food, hated the lights and the noise, hated the bed, hated being apart from Brian in our bed at night. Now I can imagine that I’ll hate being away from Annie. I was so much happier when we came home and even Anne perked right now, going from a good nurser to a champion nurser and even sleeping for longer stretches. It was like we all destressed once we were home. How much better would it be to just STAY HOME?
I have a lot of other reasons for wanting this. But it’s too late now. Even though I’m all fired up about it again, I should have just made the switch 3 months ago when I wanted to. Now I’m due in 2 weeks and really, could have the baby any day. Just not enough time to prep and find a midwife and get all the work done on it. So I have a plan and I’ll stick with it.
Rats. 
But if – and right now, that’s a HUGE “IF” – I have a third, it will definitely be a homebirth and a certified midwife.
So yes. Go watch the film.
In other updates, I had another doctor’s appointment this week. Unfortunately, no rumblings of early labour. I think we’re in it for another week at the very least. No prelabour signs so far.
I did test positive for Group B Strep. Not sure what that means other than that I evidently need an antibiotic right before delivery. I need to do my research on this and find out more about it. Anyone got any ideas?
I’m starting to do my “last two weeks weight gain”. All the books say “Oh, you’ll start to lose weight now.” Whatever. I packed on 15 pounds in my last two weeks with Anne while hardly eating anything. Same thing looks to be happening again. I’m not too worried. The weight dropped very quickly with Anne and I’ve already informed Brian that I expect to rejoin a gym in a month or two as much for mental health reasons as for physical reasons. LOL
The baby’s heartbeat continues to get higher every week. This time it was between 158 and 167. It’s also growing quite a bit. They anticipate minimum of “High 8s”. So a little more info for the Baby Pool guessers…. The baby is also VERY active still. It’s in the right position, locked and loaded, as they say. But squirming as all get out.
I’ve had a few problems like the swelling and carpal tunnel etc. I’m not open to antibiotics or treatments while pregnant (I prayed for days about whether or not to take TUMS for pity’s sake) so, as my doctor said, I’ll just wait and in two weeks or so, I’ll be cured!
BABY CENTRE UPDATE
Can you tell if you’re carrying a boy or a girl? One hint may come from the size of your baby — boys tend to be slightly heavier than girls. Babies at week 39 weigh about 6.8 to 7 pounds / 3 to 3.2 kilograms and continue to build the fat stores that will help regulate body temperature after birth. Your little one’s organ systems are fully developed and in place, but the lungs will be last to reach maturity. (Even after your baby is born, it may take a few hours before she establishes a normal breathing pattern.)
Wondering what colour your baby’s eyes will be? Most Caucasian babies are born with dark blue eyes and their true eye colour — be it brown, green or blue — may not reveal itself for weeks or months. The colour of your baby’s eyes in the first minutes after birth won’t last — exposure to light changes a baby’s initial eye colour. Most African and Asian babies usually have dark grey or brown eyes at birth — their dark eyes becoming a true brown or black after the first six months or year. Multiracial children often turn out to have the most beautiful coloured eyes.
